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The Prosecution: Bella

Whenever my partner doesn't wear something I've presented him, I experience upset. Buying items is my way of expressing I value him

I truly love selecting gifts for my significant other, him. It concerns caring; I feel thrilled when I see a piece that reminds me of him.

I especially like to get him clothes – I believe it gives him a small morale increase. Although I already like his fashion sense, it's my approach of demonstrating I love.

I earn a higher salary than him, so it's not problematic to buy him gifts. I realize not everyone show love through items, but if I can afford it, there's no reason not to?

But when he avoids wearing an item I've given him, especially after I've taken care into it, I get hurt.

During summer, I got him a set of blue jeans. Yet I noticed he wasn't wearing them, and questioned if he enjoyed them.

He walked down the next day putting on them, saying: "Hey, I've got your denim on!" That made me feel silly.

It seemed as if he was just putting on them since I had inquired. To some extent felt happy, but another part felt as if he was behaving to shut me up.

I don't expect him to put on all gifts promptly or to show thanks, but whenever weeks elapse and I never notice him sporting my gifts, I commence to question if he liked them in the beginning.

I want him to appear his finest – so, indeed, I have opinions about what suits him.

Previously, I sought to discard his footwear. I can't stand them. He got very annoyed. Maybe I crossed boundaries a somewhat.

He stated I was trying to remove his character, but I didn't. I only wanted him to recognize what I perceive: that he could seem amazing if he upgraded his wardrobe somewhat.

Axel has got great fashion sense when he wants to, and I get frustrated when he sticks to the same few things out of routine.

I guess that's due to the fact that he lacks as much enthusiasm in clothing as I do and lacks as much money to invest in his wardrobe.

Yet, from my perspective, sometimes it's not about the clothes at all; it's about wanting to feel that my gestures are recognized.

I love that he is independent and stubborn; it's part of what characterizes him. But I furthermore desire he'd recognize that when I get him things, I'm only trying to relate to him.

His Perspective: His View

I was unattached so long I'm unfamiliar with people getting me gifts – and I am uncomfortable with receiving instructions what to do

I feel my girlfriend's habit of buying me items and then becoming upset when I avoid wearing them is problematic.

Not anyone should be pressured to utilize a present each time the giver wishes. It reduces from the significance of a gift, which is supposed to be altruistic.

Concerning the denim, I simply hadn't had opportunity for wearing them because it was quite warm this season.

Yet when she inquired if I appreciated them, I put them on the very next day.

My girlfriend afterward charged me of merely sporting them to satisfy her, which was somewhat correct. But my perspective is: avoid asking me to wear a piece you purchased and then charge me of not genuinely desiring to wear it.

This situation seems reasonable.

I should be free to choose when to wear my clothes. She is being very thoughtful when she gets me items, but I wish to avoid feeling compelled.

She claimed I was thankless when I raised this issue, but it's really different.

Bella furthermore earns a lot more funds than me, and it doesn't represent a big deal for her to spend freely on new items.

But I don't have that numerous clothes, and I'm used to putting on the identical ensembles. It takes me a little while to acclimate to having fresh items in my closet.

I'm likewise unfamiliar with others buying me gifts, as this is my initial partnership. There's probably additionally a bit of me behaving determined.

Whenever she attempted to get rid of my Crocs, I didn't react favorably.

I actually like the jeans she bought me, but occasionally if she has a great thought, my initial reaction is to refuse to implement it, just because I've been alone for so considerably and I don't like being told what to do.

My girlfriend has also pointed out this propensity in me, and I understand I must to address it.

Nevertheless, another part of me doubts whether my girlfriend is getting me items because she's {trying|attempt